Kids and Divorce: 13 Things Kids want Parents to know (link to full article) By Isolina Ricci, Ph.D.
- We need to know you love us, will protect us, and won’t leave us.
- Listen respectfully to our questions and opinions even if you don’t agree.
- Accept that we need a lot of time to adjust even when we don’t show it.
- Keep your arguments to yourself. We don’t want to see them or hear them
- Keep us out of the middle of your stuff with the other parent. We are just kids.
- Don’t ask us to spy, pass messages, or take sides.
- Give us a chance to talk with kids who are also going through this.
- Help us express our feelings and coach us on how to manage them.
- Give us space and time to grieve the loss of our old life at our own pace.
- Help us get organized for going back and forth. Be patient.
- Please confide in people your own age. We can’t be an adult or a spouse.
- Tell us we aren’t to blame for your problems and it’s not our job to fix them.
- Show us its OK to love and want to be with both of you.
A highly respected, practical book about post-separation parenting. Versions are available for parents and children and there is a Kindle edition
Responding to high conflict communication using the BIFF Response Method (Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm)