How to Find Peace During a High Conflict Divorce

High conflict divorce - find peace during acrimonious divorce with divorce coaching
Photo by Timur Weber

Divorce rarely happens peacefully, and if you are dealing with a high-conflict divorce with an unreasonable or even spiteful ex-spouse, you will need support. Not just to deal with the emotional toll but to learn the tools to avoid aggravating an already volatile situation.  

If you’re in the process of divorcing a vindictive or narcissistic ex, you are not alone – and there is support available. 

Divorcing a narcissist

Once married to a narcissist, you will know that divorcing one will not be calm, productive and reasonable. They will do everything they can to keep you tangled in their web. You may be made to feel like you are crazy, and that your very clear memory of an event is inaccurate or wrong. Another tactic is to push you to breaking point, then when you snap, calmly tell you, “See, youre unhinged. You need help.” Narcissists can push you to react badly so you can play the villain’s part in their story.

How high conflict divorce coaching can help

A high conflict divorce coach knows all the games narcissists play. The smear campaign, the flying monkeys (their supporters) they send, the love bombing, the financial abuse and gaslighting are all typical tactics used during marriage and divorce to cause maximum high conflict and emotional exhaustion for you.  

Many of the behaviours of narcissists can be deflected and avoided. This is especially important when children are involved. When you use a divorce coach, you have an ally that can advise you on the actions that need to be taken – and when. They will assist you to keep your children’s emotional well-being protected, too.  

High conflict divorce coaching will support you through all the tricks that narcissists try. If you have been married to one for a while, you may have become so conditioned to their behaviour that you don’t even see it as toxic. This means you may react in a way that will damage your case rather than assist it.  

Tools for a better divorce

Being introduced to communication skills such as Grey Rock Method, unlearning reactive abuse, and knowing the correct language to use when writing and dealing with court matters can make all the difference, avoiding years of painful and expensive court battles and instead facilitating a more precise and quicker result. A professional that knows how to deal with a high conflict ex and assists you to manage their constant need for validation, control and power can change the course of a stressful divorce.

If you know that you are headed for a high conflict divorce, either through circumstances or because of your ex's personality, contact us at Divorce Hub and consider using a Divorce Coach to give you back some control and peace.